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April 27, 2024

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Location:

Mesa,AZ,USA

Member Since:

May 12, 2008

Gender:

Male

Goal Type:

Other

Running Accomplishments:

I started running again in 2007 after 14 years of not running.

Mile - 4:59 (high school 1992), 5:57 (9/21/2010 ARR Open Mile)

2 mile - 11:10 (high school 1992)

5k - 21:54 (11/18/2010 Tempe Road Runners 5k)

10k - 48:29 (5/9/2009 Race for Hospice)

Unofficial 10k - 47:11 (1/27/2011 Red Mountain Park)

1/2 marathon - 1:49:00 (4/4/2009 Havasu Half)

Marathon - 4:33:09 (11/21/2009 Mesquite Marathon)

Short-Term Running Goals:

Run a half marathon in under two hours.

Run a marathon in close to 4 hours.

Long-Term Running Goals:

Stay healthy long enough to live through the millenium.

Personal:

I am married and have six kids. 

Blog title explanation

Bloggers I've met in real life: 1MileToGo, Aaron Kennard, Andrea North, Arizona Desert Monsoon, auntieem, Bec, Ben, Benjamin, Bonnie, Camille, Cari, Collin Anderson, David Holt, DooneEight Kid Mom, Erico, Flatlander, Gary, Jake Krong, JamesW, Jose, Josse, Julieesplin, JunKelli, Kerri, KP, Kyle Dion, Lightitup, Little Bad Legs, Lybi, Marthon Dreamer, M, Mary Ann Schauerhamer, Misty, Nan, Peds Endo Doc, Rachelle, RADRhett, Riley Cook, Rossy, runningafterbabies, Sasha, Scott Hughes, Scott (Kelli's husband), Scott Wesemann, Slow Joe, Spencer Simpson, Stephen, Steve Piccolo, Susie, The Rookie, Toby, Tracy, Twinkies, TylerS, Walter

Favorite Blogs:

Click to donate
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Miles:This week: 0.00 Month: 0.00 Year: 0.00
Mizuno Wave Inspire 7 Lifetime Miles: 803.99
Asics Gel 3030 Lifetime Miles: 204.85
Saucony Hurricane 13 Lifetime Miles: 149.22
Asics Gel DS Trainer 17 Lifetime Miles: 87.49
Mizuno Wave Inspire 9 Lifetime Miles: 800.59
Brooks Ravenna 4 Lifetime Miles: 88.83
Mizuno X10 Trail Lifetime Miles: 180.06
Mizuno Wave Inspire 10 Lifetime Miles: 802.77
Asics Gel Kayano 21 Lifetime Miles: 56.47
Mizuno Wave Inspire 11 (blue) Lifetime Miles: 800.75
New Balance 1260v5 Lifetime Miles: 9.19
Reebok Floatride Lifetime Miles: 8.23
Total Distance
5.51

There was an entirely new "Lady" Liberty out this morning.  These people must be a dime a dozen.  His sign said Honk for Liberty so I yelled at him to give me a high five for liberty.  Of course he did.  I was glad to see the dead dog was gone.

I guess I should tell the story about the time I saw the bum passed out on the sidewalk.  When I lived 8 miles from work I would run home once a week.  This was a few months before I was a blogger.  One hot summer day as I was headed home saw an object in the middle of the sidewalk.  I couldn't make out what it was at first.  I had my headphones on, probably listening to The Final Countdown at the time, and I was carrying my cell phone which was my Garmin.  "Is that a pile of clothes?" was my first thought.  "No.  It's in the shape of a human being.  Clearly it can't be a human being because even though the sun is about to go down, the sidewalk is freakin' hot!"  I got a little closer and thought, "Is that a blow up doll?  I guess someone will be lonely tonight."  But as I got within 10 feet I saw that it was indeed a man.  I pulled my headphones out and said, "Oh crud."  As I ran by him I yelled at him, "Sir, are you okay?"  Nothing.  Again, "Oh crud."  I knew I had to stop and turn around.

At this point I look for any signs of movement.  The dude is just laying there, eyes closed head pointing upwards.  I yell again.  His chest doesn't even look like it's moving.  The only thing I could think of was how my father had just passed away a few months earlier, and I had to dress him for the funeral.  There didn't seem to be much difference between what this guy looked like and the corpse of my father.  I didn't want to touch him.  So I dialed 911 and told him that there was a body in the middle of the sidewalk and it's not showing any signs of life.  About that time two ladies came running up.  One bent over and woke the guy up.  I told the dispatcher he was alive, but even it didn't matter if he was alive or dead.  Nobody should be sleeping in the middle of a sidewalk especially with how hot it was.

Anyway, I was pretty much freaked out after that and only made it another mile before I called my wife to come pick me.  The moral of the story is if you see a dead body in the sidewalk, kick it.

Time - 46:50 (avg. pace 8:30)

Splits - 8:31, 8:24, 8:32, 8:33, 8:31, 4:20

Mizuno Wave Inspire 7 Miles: 5.51
Weight: 198.00
Comments
From RAD on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 15:36:29 from 67.172.229.125

2 things: I hope to never see a dead body on the sidewalk - I don't think I would kick it, but thanks for the advice :)

Nice work this morning Burt, great pace and miles to start out the week!

From The Quiet Pirate on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 16:16:00 from 152.26.59.252

Thanks for the daily dose of widsom. Nice job on your miles this morning.

Glad your new "lady" is down with the high 5 mornings.

From Camille on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 16:21:55 from 71.223.65.111

kick it? that's a bit harsh. Are you ready for Ragnar?

From Burt on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 16:43:01 from 206.19.214.144

RAD - If the body is dead, then it won't feel anything. Thus, you would just be disprespecting the dead, which isn't a big deal. BUT, if the body is alive, then they need to be brought back to reality. Here in AZ, you can fry eggs on the sidewalks. Think of what would happen to someone's brain.

RAD's sister - who can resist a high five from me?

Camille - I am so ready for Ragnar. Too bad you can't do it, but great job on your marathon.

From Kori on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 16:44:04 from 67.2.36.58

Thanks for the laugh, I needed it :)

From Burt on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 16:51:56 from 206.19.214.144

What are you laughing about? I'm dead serious.

From Burt on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 16:52:03 from 206.19.214.144

That was a pun.

From Brent on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 18:13:41 from 66.7.127.219

Burt, Burt, Burt - which is your favortie lady liberty? Give the favorite lady a honk as you go by. Honk when your h...., be careful with the honking.

Hey, what happened to your 8 or 9 miles to start the week, are you tapering?

Stay Kool, b of BS rools out

From allie on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 18:58:52 from 174.23.192.205

just like stevie nicks.

From Burt on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 19:33:36 from 206.19.214.144

Merri - you just made me laugh so hard I farted.

Brent - I am tapering for Ragnar this week.

allie - wtfudge?

From Camille on Mon, Feb 21, 2011 at 21:40:21 from 71.223.65.111

Burt - who knows, maybe someone will get injured and I'll be needed last minute. :o) Either way, I'm still happy I did the marathon.

From flatlander on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 10:29:41 from 75.214.144.72

That is one of your greatest tag lines ever, and that is a pretty high standard for your blog.

From RivertonPaul on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 10:37:59 from 67.42.27.114

Typical awesomeness.

From SlowJoe on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 11:05:14 from 131.59.200.80

Good on you for not just hurdling him and moving on.

From Chad on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 11:20:42 from 168.177.153.5

When I saw the old bum pushing his shopping cart down the street, at first I felt sorry for him. But when I saw what was in his cart I thought, well no wonder you're a bum, look at the dumb things you bought. (Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy)

From I Just Run on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 14:49:54 from 67.79.11.242

I've kicked a dead body on the side of the road before, as I ran....Well it was 5:00am, pitch black and the body was some sort of dead animal...luckily not a human...!

From Burt on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 15:20:19 from 206.19.214.144

Mark - I'm always raising the bar.

Paul - I strive to be like you.

Joe - It was a very busy road and right in front of the mall. I'm surprised nobody else stopped to check on him.

Chad - Jack Handy really does make you think.

IJR - Some sort of dead animal? You're sure it wasn't your ex-wife?

From seeaprilrun on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 15:20:26 from 72.205.231.214

When I worked EMS we were often called for bums laying around. I always made them get under a bush or a bridge so people would quit calling about them all day.

From Burt on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 15:24:03 from 206.19.214.144

April - you just commented 7 seconds after me.

This guy was so drunk I wonder if he would have died if he was just left there. Then he woke up and came up to me to ask what time it was while I was still on the phone. I was like, "Hey, go away. Can't you see that I'm calling the cops on you." (I said that in my mind.)

From seeaprilrun on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 15:27:19 from 72.205.231.214

It all goes back to the moral of the story, which you learned well, kick first and if the body wakes up, especially with some profanity and a little swinging, they will live without your assistance.

From Burt on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 15:28:50 from 206.19.214.144

See? Don't take my word for it. You just heard it from a trained professional.

From Lily on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 16:34:10 from 67.199.178.210

Whaa......?

From runningafterbabies on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 16:37:34 from 24.10.211.135

Kick it? Or kick the bucket?

From Burt on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 16:44:51 from 206.19.214.144

Lily - you, Julie, Kelli, and runningafterbabies are all a part of the sore butt patrol. Who is the president?

RAB - kick it in the bucket.

From Scott Wesemann on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 17:03:54 from 66.239.250.209

Blow up doll? I don't have any experience with those, but I sure will take your word for it.

From Burt on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 17:20:33 from 206.19.214.144

One credit card receipt for Swedish-made blow up doll signed by Scott Wesemann.

One warranty card for Swedish-made blow up doll, filled out by Scott Wesemann.

One book, "Swedish-made Blow Up Dolls And Me: This Sort of Thing Is My Bag Baby", by Scott Wesemann.

From Scott Wesemann on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 17:25:41 from 66.239.250.209

Ummmmmm Swedish made?? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

From april27 on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 22:51:20 from 99.188.251.180

seriously==where do you live? I mean nearly dead people, lady liberities, lady liberities that won't high five, dead pit bulls.

FIND A NEW RUNNING ROUTE! hahah

But in all seriousness--no kicking bodies--try feeling for a carotid pulse (neck pulse)

From Burt on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 22:55:25 from 72.223.90.79

and risk them coming up and taking a bite out of my carotid artery? thank you, no.

From Karen on Tue, Feb 22, 2011 at 23:57:05 from 69.171.160.235

Burt, i didn't think you were allowed to watch that movie...poor Scott..you got some learnin to do! Don't know if I should laugh or cry, cuz I really did have a dead bum this past week...

From catherine on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 11:07:10 from 216.49.181.254

You should make a calendar of all the lady libertys.

From catherine on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 11:07:46 from 216.49.181.254

P.S. The Final Countdown was the first song we played at our wedding reception.

From Burt on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 11:32:57 from 72.223.90.79

Karen - don't judge me. How can I be such a big Helena Bonham Carter fan if I didn't watch movies like that?

Catherine - that used to be my all time favorite song. Now I just laugh because of the time Gob played it at his magic show.

From JD on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 19:50:33 from 24.10.171.14

Good heavens that was entertaining. Thanks to all who participated!

Still trying to figure out the Stevie Nicks reference...

From Burt on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 19:57:21 from 206.19.214.144

JD - It's you guys that make my blog what it is. So thanks to you all, from the bottom of my heart.

Yeah, Stevie. Must be an inside joke between allie and I that I totally forgot. I'm a horrible friend.

From allie on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 20:22:21 from 161.38.218.168

sigh...i guess you have to be from an older generation to understand:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uDIfRy4RT6g

From Burt on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 21:20:11 from 72.223.90.79

Thank you. Little old lady!

From JD on Wed, Feb 23, 2011 at 23:06:29 from 24.10.171.14

Burt, I think we've just been served.

From runningafterbabies on Thu, Feb 24, 2011 at 14:11:02 from 24.10.211.135

I nominate myself for President of the SBP. My bruises are finally fading.

From I Just Run on Thu, Feb 24, 2011 at 14:23:13 from 166.205.15.4

Hey....Wait a minute Burt, I thought this was a Running Blog...not a Political Blog...No self Nominations...!!!

From Burt on Thu, Feb 24, 2011 at 15:17:11 from 206.19.214.144

I'll second that.

IJR - Sasha encourages us to blog about everything. And I mean EVERYTHING.

From heathercolbypeck on Sun, Feb 27, 2011 at 19:58:02 from 24.97.75.130

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHA!

BURT! YOU CRACK ME UP! YOU KICK THEM WHEN THEIR DOWN. THAT'S MY MAMMA'S MOTTO! :)

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