Go, you chicken fat, go away!

December 12, 2019

Recent EntriesHomeJoin Fast Running Blog Community!PredictorHealthy RecipesBurt's RacesFind BlogsMileage BoardTop Ten Excuses for Missing a RunTop Ten Training MistakesDiscussion ForumRace Reports Send A Private MessageWeek ViewMonth View
15% off for Fast Running Blog members at St. George Running Center!



Member Since:

May 12, 2008



Goal Type:


Running Accomplishments:

I started running again in 2007 after 14 years of not running.

Mile - 4:59 (high school 1992), 5:57 (9/21/2010 ARR Open Mile)

2 mile - 11:10 (high school 1992)

5k - 21:54 (11/18/2010 Tempe Road Runners 5k)

10k - 48:29 (5/9/2009 Race for Hospice)

Unofficial 10k - 47:11 (1/27/2011 Red Mountain Park)

1/2 marathon - 1:49:00 (4/4/2009 Havasu Half)

Marathon - 4:33:09 (11/21/2009 Mesquite Marathon)

Short-Term Running Goals:

Run a half marathon in under two hours.

Run a marathon in close to 4 hours.

Long-Term Running Goals:

Stay healthy long enough to live through the millenium.


I am married and have six kids. 

Blog title explanation

Bloggers I've met in real life: 1MileToGo, Aaron Kennard, Andrea North, Arizona Desert Monsoon, auntieem, Bec, Ben, Benjamin, Bonnie, Camille, Cari, Collin Anderson, David Holt, DooneEight Kid Mom, Erico, Flatlander, Gary, Jake Krong, JamesW, Jose, Josse, Julieesplin, JunKelli, Kerri, KP, Kyle Dion, Lightitup, Little Bad Legs, Lybi, Marthon Dreamer, M, Mary Ann Schauerhamer, Misty, Nan, Peds Endo Doc, Rachelle, RADRhett, Riley Cook, Rossy, runningafterbabies, Sasha, Scott Hughes, Scott (Kelli's husband), Scott Wesemann, Slow Joe, Spencer Simpson, Stephen, Steve Piccolo, Susie, The Rookie, Toby, Tracy, Twinkies, TylerS, Walter

Favorite Blogs:

Miles:This week: 5.16 Month: 26.26 Year: 637.24
Mizuno Wave Inspire 7 Lifetime Miles: 802.53
Asics Gel 3030 Lifetime Miles: 204.85
Saucony Hurricane 13 Lifetime Miles: 149.22
Asics Gel DS Trainer 17 Lifetime Miles: 87.49
Mizuno Wave Inspire 9 Lifetime Miles: 800.59
Brooks Ravenna 4 Lifetime Miles: 88.83
Mizuno X10 Trail Lifetime Miles: 105.76
Mizuno Wave Inspire 10 Lifetime Miles: 800.21
Asics Gel Kayano 21 Lifetime Miles: 3.99
Mizuno Wave Inspire 11 (blue) Lifetime Miles: 229.39
New Balance 1260v5 Lifetime Miles: 9.19
Reebok Floatride Lifetime Miles: 8.23
Total Distance

I'm pretty sure I broke a world record today in running.

Time - 47:51 (avg. pace 8:50)

Splits - 8:38, 8:37, 8:53, 9:01, 8:55, 3:48 for 0.42

Poo poo.

Mizuno Wave Inspire 7 Miles: 5.42
Weight: 197.00
From RAD on Wed, Mar 09, 2011 at 23:21:24 from

world record for what? how much you had to poo poo?

From Karen on Wed, Mar 09, 2011 at 23:26:31 from

AHH! The perfect blog post...

From Karen on Wed, Mar 09, 2011 at 23:30:11 from

Great...I launched another dog laughing so hard...good thing I have 3 of them!

From Burt on Wed, Mar 09, 2011 at 23:34:57 from

RAD - In running! Not the runs!

Karen - I knew you'd love this post. Sorry your dogs don't have 9 lives.

From The Quiet Pirate on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 12:05:15 from

A world record for the most sweat during a run?

From Burt on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 12:43:18 from

QP - I was going to get mad at you for saying that. Then I remembered there was a lavishly abundant amount of sweat.

From Lily on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 16:31:43 from

Burt was sweating profusely, had diarrhea and ran incredibly slow splits. World record 3breaker indeed.

From Derunzo on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 19:13:12 from

Speaking of Poo poo.... I had an interesting run this afternoon.

From SlowJoe on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 19:27:00 from

Now we have to guess the world record? You stepped in the most dog poo per mile? Had the greatest number of sharts without changing shorts?

From Burt on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 19:29:33 from

Lily - Now you're my sixth favorite blogger behind the other Lily.

Funzo - They don't call you DeRUNZo for nothing.

From Burt on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 19:32:08 from

I didn't break any world records! It was merely a test to see if people read about my running or just cut straight to the poo poo!

From Rye on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 19:54:20 from

Joe... I must live in a closet...sharts! I have a new term to use. I am so thankful for this blog. Not for you Burt, just the blog.

From allie on Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 23:56:03 from

good thing you spelled poo right. scott ensign hates pooh with an "h"

ask him.

From april27 on Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 22:41:20 from

there is just too much poo going on in this blog!

From Burt on Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 23:56:21 from

Rye - Some day when we're in the same ward I expect to hear you say that in your testimony only replace blog with ward.

allie - done and done.

April - I have some poo songs I can teach you. Hands on your booty, feet on the floor, fifty yard dash to the bathroom door, diarrhea drip drip, diarrhea drip drip, some people think it's green and runny, others think it's really funny.

Oh man. How do I still remember that song Robert Dodd taught me from the 2nd grade?

From april27 on Sat, Mar 12, 2011 at 11:01:14 from

your teachers must have been so proud!

From rAtTLeTrAp on Sat, Mar 12, 2011 at 12:56:02 from

I think I need to teach that song to my grandson. He's 4 and his mom is going to love it... muah-ha-ha

Add Your Comment.
  • Keep it family-safe. No vulgar or profane language. To discourage anonymous comments of cowardly nature, your IP address will be logged and posted next to your comment.
  • Do not respond to another person's comment out of context. If he made the original comment on another page/blog entry, go to that entry and respond there.
  • If all you want to do is contact the blogger and your comment is not connected with this entry and has no relevance to others, send a private message instead.
Only registered users with public blogs are allowed to post comments. Log in with your username and password or create an account and set up a blog.
Debt Reduction Calculator

Featured Announcements
Web fastrunningblog.com
New Kids on the Blog
(need a welcome):
Lone Faithfuls
(need a comment):